Breastfeeding is one of the most beautiful natural occurrences in the world. It is among the many amazing things that the female body can do. When I think about the fact that I MADE a human and am now feeding him with my own body, I am in awe. The first time I nursed my son, I cried. I had to wait almost a week to have the joy of holding him for the first time, and waited over a week to have the experience of feeding him (see Baby Update | Home From The NICU). So my tears were mostly tears of joy for finally doing what every mother normally does in the first hour of her child’s life. They were also tears of relief, because it was not easy to get Ant to latch. It was really, really hard. From that day we have had ups and downs- from having to switch to a special formula, to returning to breast feeding, to growth spurts, and blocked ducts. Fortunately, I have many knowledgeable friends and access to some really great lactation consultants. Because I know how difficult breastfeeding truly can be, I would like to share what I’ve learned with you. I hope if you are having hard times that this will help. Don’t give up, Mama!
There is so much I want to share with you, but for the past few weeks my life has revolved around sterilizing, breast pumping, cleaning shit and drying tears. So, it’s been hard to collect all my thoughts and feelings about my experience as a new mom. Every time I sit down to write this entry I’m reminded of all the horrible things I have felt and dealt with and it’s not easy to talk about. And then, of course, baby Ant starts crying. I type a few sentences and am called away. I love being a mom, but it makes writing hard. Here is my attempt at telling Ant’s story so far… Continue reading